It’s not like I’m some crazy Birkenstock wearing woman who uses The Rock on her underarms. I like lipstick as much as the next girl—I just like to know mine’s lead-free. Think I’m kidding? Go to the Environmental Working Group’s Cosmetics Safety Database and search your brand of lipstick. More than 60% contain lead, which is a neurotoxin. And most women eat about nine pounds of the stuff over their lifetimes. But seriously, there are so many awesome beauty products that are totally chemical free these days, why would you want to use anything else?

At EcoStiletto, I feature beauty options that just might get you off chemicals altogether. But for the DIYers among us (read: me), I whipped up a facial scrub/mask recipe that you can make in minutes and delivers a serious glow.

How? Go to the kitchen and grab sugar, eggs, honey and instant oatmeal. Go on, I’ll wait!

A little background: I love scrubs but don’t like that most of them contain oil. I like things that can be used on my face, hair and body—and oil isn’t one of them, no matter how pure, it still gives me zits and always ends up in my hair. So I created this Essential DIY Scrub & Mask that I’m totally addicted to—used it for three days straight (okay I’m a little obsessive) and seriously my skin was NEVER better. My blackheads were gone, my giant pores were smaller and my skin felt super soft and clean. Try it!

Essential DIY Scrub & Mask:

Six tablespoons raw organic sugar
One free range organic egg white
One tablespoon organic honey
One packet plain instant organic oatmeal

Strain the egg white into a bowl (or mortar, if you’ve got one), then blend in the sugar with a fork (or pestle). Blend in the honey, and then the oatmeal (leave it uncooked). Now rub the mask into your skin in small circles.

Some people think that sugar can be too harsh for the face, so if your skin is sensitive, please be gentle. I, on the other hand, have alligator skin. I like to put some muscle into it.

Once you’ve thoroughly exfoliated your face, just clump some more of the scrub onto it and let it dry for 10 to 20 minutes. (Make sure you’re wearing not-so-nice clothes, as it sometimes does fall off a bit.) Wash off, and presto, glow-o!

You can also use the scrub in the bath or shower—because it lacks oil, you don’t have to worry about slippage. Make sure your pipes can handle the small amount of oatmeal involved. And keep any excess in the fridge—it’ll keep for a few days, but after that, toss it. (If you use it straight outta the fridge you might need to dilute with a little water for better spreadability, just fyi.)

The secret ingredient to this recipe is honey. Honey is a natural emollient, which means it helps the skin trap moisture. When I visit my family in Santa Fe, I always stick a bunch of organic honey sticks in my carry on. At night, I crack open one of those sticks and slather the stuff on my face. I leave it on for 10 minutes or so and wash it off. (It helps if I haven’t already had dessert. Yum.) It leaves my skin super dewy and soft, minus pore-clogging oil.

Sugar is a natural exfoliant, as is oatmeal, which also has colloidal—or soothing—properties. I’ve used whipped egg whites on my skin for years to cleanse and minimize pores—recently I heard that egg whites also increase the production of collagen, which is something I didn’t care about as a tweenager. I’m not a beauty scientists so I can’t tell you exactly how it breaks down. But for those of you who are trying this right now, tell me how you look in 20 minutes. It works, right?